For tennis star Destanee Aiava, borderline personality disorder felt like ‘a death sentence’ – and a relief. What is it?
10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.
Last week, Australian Open player Destanee Aiava revealed she had struggled with borderline personality disorder.
The tennis player said a formal diagnosis, after suicidal behaviour and severe panic attacks, “was a relief”. But “it also felt like a death sentence because it’s something that I have to live with my whole life”.
A diagnosis is often associated with therapeutic nihilism. This means it’s viewed as impossible to treat, and can leave clinicians and people with the condition in despair.
In fact, people with this disorder can and do recover with adequate support. Understanding it is caused by trauma is fundamental to effectively treat this complex and poorly understood mental illness.
A stigmatising diagnosis
The name “borderline personality disorder” is confusing and adds greatly to the stigma around it.
Doctors first used “borderline” to describe a condition they believed was in-between two others: neurosis and psychosis.
But this implies the condition is not real in itself, and can invalidate the suffering and distress the person and their loved ones experience.
“Personality disorder” is a judgemental term that describes the very essence of a person – their personality – as flawed.
What is borderline personality disorder?
People with the disorder can express a range of symptoms, but high levels of anxiety – including panic attacks – are usually constant.
Symptoms cluster around four main areas:
- high impulsivity (leading to suicidal thoughts and behaviour, self-harm and other risky behaviours)
- unstable or poor sense of self (including low self-esteem)
- mood disturbances (including intense, inappropriate anger, episodic depression or mania)
- problems in relationships.
People with the disorder greatly fear being abandoned and as a result, commonly have distressing difficulties in interpersonal relationships.
This creates a “push-pull” dynamic with loved ones, as people with borderline personality disorder seek closeness, but push away those they love to test the strength of the relationship.
For example, they may escalate a small issue into a major disagreement to see if the loved one will “stick with them” and reinforce their love.
Conversely, if a loved one appears distant or fed up – for example, is thinking about ending the relationship – the person with borderline personality disorder will make major efforts to “pull” them back. This might look like a flurry of messages, expressions of despair, or even suicidal behaviours.
Who does it affect?
The disorder affects one in 100 Australians, although this is likely a conservative estimate, as diagnosis is based on the most severe symptoms.
Women are much more likely to be diagnosed with it than men – but why this is so remains a major debate, with political and sociological factors playing a role in making psychiatric diagnoses. Symptoms usually begin in the mid to late teens.
While an initial response to receiving a diagnosis can be comforting for some, it is commonly seen as a chronic, relapsing condition, meaning symptoms can return after a period of improvement.
Borderline personality disorder can fluctuate in intensity and mimic other conditions such as major depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety disorders and psychosis.
Estimates suggest 26% of presentations at emergency departments for mental health issues are by people diagnosed with personality disorders, particularly borderline personality disorder.
What causes it?
The main cause for borderline personality disorder appears to be trauma in early life, compounded by repeated traumas later.
Early life trauma can lead to biological changes in the brain that cause behavioural, emotional or cognitive shifts, leading to social and relationship issues. This is known as complex post-traumatic stress disorder.
Aiava has acknowledged the disorder is “mainly from childhood trauma”, although she has not given details about her specific experiences.
People with borderline personality disorder usually have complex post-traumatic stress disorder. But complex post-traumatic stress disorder doesn’t always result in a borderline personality disorder diagnosis.
Although the two disorders are not identical, they share many similarities, in particular that they are both caused by complex and repeated trauma.
However those with borderline personality disorder tend to experience more rage, emotional disturbances and have a greater fear of abandonment.
They also face greater stigma, whereas the term “complex post-traumatic stress disorder” doesn’t carry the same negative connotations and focuses on the cause of the condition – trauma – rather than “personality”, leading to better treatment options.
The recognition of the major role of trauma in borderline personality disorder is an important step forward in treating the disorder. But because of the stigma associated with it, using the diagnosis of complex post-traumatic stress disorder maybe a better step forward in the future.
Can it be treated?
There are many effective psychological therapies and other treatments for people with borderline personality disorder or complex post-traumatic stress disorder.
For example, dialectical behavioural therapy is a type of cognitive therapy that helps people learn skills such as tolerating distress, managing relationships, regulating emotions and practising mindfulness.
The treatment of people with post-traumatic stress disorder, including victims of war and rape, has taught us a lot about how to treat complex, underlying trauma. For example, with trauma-focused psychological therapies.
Other new treatments, such as eye movement desensitisation and reprogramming, have also shown to be effective.
Many people with borderline personality disorder who receive treatment and have supportive relationships are able to “outgrow” the condition. Others may need to continue to manage symptoms while pursuing a good quality of life.
Treating trauma, not personality
Rethinking borderline personality disorder as a trauma disorder enables a more effective and understanding approach for those with it.
Understanding what trauma does to the brain means newer, targeted medications can also be used.
For example, our research has shown how the brain’s glutamate system – the chemicals responsible for learning and making sense of one’s environment – is overactive in people with complex post-traumtic stress disorder. Medications that work on the glutumate system may therefore help alleviate borderline personality disorder symptoms.
Educating partners and families about borderline personality disorder, providing them support and co-designing crisis strategies are also important parts of total care. Preventing early life trauma is also critical.
If this article has raised issues for you, or if you’re concerned about someone you know, call Lifeline on 13 11 14.
Jayashri Kulkarni, Professor of Psychiatry, Monash University and Eveline Mu, Research Fellow in Women’s Mental Health, Monash University
This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.
Don’t Forget…
Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!
Recommended
Learn to Age Gracefully
Join the 98k+ American women taking control of their health & aging with our 100% free (and fun!) daily emails:
-
Scheduling Tips for Overrunning Tasks
10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.
Your Questions, Our Answers!
Q: Often I schedule time for things, but the task takes longer than I think, or multiplies while I’m doing it, and then my schedule gets thrown out. Any ideas?
A: A relatable struggle! Happily, there are remedies:
- Does the task really absolutely need to be finished today? If not, just continue it in scheduled timeslots until it’s completed.
- Some tasks do indeed need to be finished today (hi, writer of a daily newsletter here!), so it can be useful to have an idea of how long things really take, in advance. While new tasks can catch us unawares, recurring or similar-to-previous tasks can be estimated based on how long they took previously. For this reason, we recommend doing a time audit every now and again, to see how you really use your time.
- A great resource that you should include in your schedule is a “spare” timeslot, ideally at least one per day. Call it a “buffer” or a “backup” or whatever (in my schedule it’s labelled “discretionary”), but the basic idea is that it’s a scheduled timeslot with nothing scheduled in it, and it works as an “overflow” catch-all.
Additionally:
- You can usually cut down the time it takes you to do tasks by setting “Deep Work” rules for yourself. For example: cut out distractions, single-task, work in for example 25-minute bursts with 5-minute breaks, etc
- You can also usually cut down the time it takes you to do tasks by making sure you’re prepared for them. Not just task-specific preparation, either! A clear head on, plenty of energy, the resources you’ll need (including refreshments!) to hand, etc can make a huge difference to efficiency.
See Also: Time Optimism and the Planning Fallacy
Do you have a question you’d like to see answered here? Hit reply or use the feedback widget at the bottom; we’d love to hear from you!
Share This Post
-
Science-Based Alternative Pain Relief
10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.
When Painkillers Aren’t Helping, These Things Might
Maybe you want to avoid painkillers, or maybe you’ve already maxed out what you can have, and want more options as an extra help against the pain.
Today we’ll look at some science-backed alternative pain relief methods:
First: when should we try to relieve pain?
There is no such thing as “this pain is not too much”. The correct amount of pain is zero. Maybe your body won’t let you reach zero, but more than that is “too much” already.
You don’t have to be suffering off the scale to deserve relief from pain!
So: if it hurts, then if you can safely get relief from the pain, it’s already wise to do so.
A couple of things we covered previously
CBD and THC are technically drugs, but are generally considered “alternative” pain relief, so we’ll give a quick mention here:
Short version:
- CBD can treat some kinds of treatment-resistant pain well (others, not so much—try it and find out if it works for you)
- THC can offer some people respite not found from other methods—but beware, because there are many health risks to consider.
Acupuncture
Pain relief appears to be its strongest suit:
Pinpointing The Usefulness Of Acupuncture
Cloves
Yes, just like you can get from the supermarket.
In its medicinal uses, it’s most well-known as a toothache remedy, but it has a local analgesic effect wherever you put it (i.e., apply it topically to where the pain is), thanks to its eugenol content:
Boswellia (frankincense)
The resin of the Boswellia serrata tree, this substance has an assortment of medicinal properties, including pain relief, anti-inflammatory effect, and psychoactive (anxiolytic and antidepressant) effects:
Frankincense is psychoactive: new class of antidepressants might be right under our noses
And as for physical pain? Here’s how it faired against the pain of osteoarthritis (and other OA symptoms, but we’re focusing on pain today), for example:
Here’s an example product on Amazon, but feel free to shop around as there are many options, including for example this handy roll-on
Further reading
Intended for chronic pain, but in large part applicable to acute pain also:
Managing Chronic Pain (Realistically!)
Take care!
Share This Post
-
Superfood Baked Apples
10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.
Superfoods, and super-tasty. This is a healthy twist on a classic; your blood sugars will thank you for choosing this tasty sweet delight. It’s also packed with nutrients!
You will need
- 2 large firm baking apples, cored but not peeled
- 1/2 cup chopped walnuts
- 3 tbsp goji berries, rehydrated (soak them in warm water for 10–15minutes and drain)
- 1 tbsp honey, or maple syrup, per your preference (this writer is also a fan of aged balsamic vinegar for its strong flavor and much milder sweetness. If you don’t like things to be too sweet, this is the option for you)
- 2 tsp ground sweet cinnamon
- 1 tsp ground ginger
Method
(we suggest you read everything at least once before doing anything)
1) Preheat the oven to 180℃ / 350℉ / gas mark 4
2) Mix the chopped walnuts with the goji berries and the honey (or whatever you used instead of the honey) as well as the sweet cinnamon and the ginger.
3) Place the apples in shallow baking dish, and use the mixture you just made to stuff their holes.
4) Add 1/2 cup water to the dish, around the apples. Cover gently with foil, and bake until soft.
Tip: check them every 20 minutes; they may be done in 40 or it may take 60; in honesty it depends on your oven. If unsure, cook them for longer at a lower temperature.
5) Serve warm.
Enjoy!
Want to learn more?
For those interested in some of the science of what we have going on today:
- From Apples to Bees, and High-Fructose C’s
- Why You Should Diversify Your Nuts!
- Goji Berries: Which Benefits Do They Really Have?
- The Sugary Food That Lowers Blood Sugars
- Honey vs Maple Syrup – Which is Healthier?
- A Tale Of Two Cinnamons ← this is important, about why we chose the sweet cinnamon
- Ginger Does A Lot More Than You Think
Take care!
Share This Post
Related Posts
-
Sweet Potato vs Winter Squash – Which is Healthier?
10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.
Our Verdict
When comparing sweet potato to winter squash, we picked the sweet potato.
Why?
In terms of macros, the sweet potato has 2x the protein, 2x the carbs, and slightly more fiber. Because the protein numbers are small, the carb:fiber ratio is the deciding factor here, and has winter squash has the lower glycemic index (assuming cooking them both on a like-for-like basis), we’re going with that on macros, but it’s subjective.
In the category of vitamins, sweet potato has more of vitamins A, B1, B2, B3, B5, B6, C, E, and choline, while winter squash has more of vitamins B9 and K. It’s interesting to note that while sweet potato is rightly famous for its vitamin A content, winter squash is actually very good for that too. Still, by the numbers, it’s a clear 9:2 victory for sweet potato here.
When it comes to minerals, sweet potato has more calcium copper, iron, magnesium, manganese, phosphorus, potassium, and zinc, while winter squash has more selenium, meaning an 8:1 victory for sweet potato this time.
In short, enjoy either or both, but sweet potato is the more nutritionally dense option for sure.
Want to learn more?
You might like to read:
Carb-Strong or Carb-Wrong? Should You Go Light Or Heavy On Carbs?
Enjoy!
Don’t Forget…
Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!
Learn to Age Gracefully
Join the 98k+ American women taking control of their health & aging with our 100% free (and fun!) daily emails:
-
Ready… Set… Flow!
10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.
Time to make your new year plans? Or maybe you’ve already made a list, and you’re checking it twice. If so, now’s the time to make sure that your new year’s plans will flow:
“Flow”, as you may be aware, is the psychological state generally defined as “a state in which we feel good about what we’re doing, and just keep doing it, at a peak performance level”; the term was coined by psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi and has risen to popularity since.
We wrote about it a little before, here:
Morning Routines That Just Flow
The above article details how to start the perfect day, but how to start the perfect year? Firstly, it’s good to get the jump on the new year a little; see:
The Science Of New Year’s Pre-Resolutions
…and we also agree with Dr. Faye Bate, who preaches taking the path of least resistance when it comes to healthy habits:
How To Actually Start A Healthy Lifestyle In The New Year
Because…
Getting into the flow
The most hydrating drink is the one that [contains adequate water and] you will actually drink. The best exercise is the one you’ll do. The best sleep is the sleep you can actually get. And so on.
We see this—or rather its evil counterpoint—a lot in diet culture. People frame their willpower against the temptations of donuts and whatever, and make Faustian bargains whereby they will eat food they find boring in the hopes it will bring them good health. And it won’t. Because, they’ll give up quickly.
Instead, each part of our healthy life has to be engaged with with a sense of flow. Again, that’s: “a state in which we feel good about what we’re doing, and just keep doing it, at a peak performance level”
So we need to find healthy recipes we like (check out our recipe section!), we need to find exercise that we like, we need to find an approach to sleep that the Geneva Convention wouldn’t consider a kind a torture, and so forth. And, ideally, not just “like” in the sense of “this is tolerable” but “like” in the sense of “I am truly passionate about this thing”.
And that’s going to look different for each of us.
Running is a great example of something that some people truly love, whereas others will do almost anything to avoid.
And food? We’ve written before about the usefulness of a “to don’t” list; it’s like a “to do” list, but it’s things we’re not going to even try to do. For example, a person with two addictions is usually advised to quit one at a time, so quitting the other would go on a “to don’t” list for now. The same goes for food; you need to enjoy what you’re eating or you won’t “feel good about what we’re doing, and just keep doing it”, per flow. So, do not deprive yourself; it won’t work anyway; just pick one healthy change to make, and then queue up any other changes for once the first one has started feeling natural to you.
For more on “to don’t” lists and other such tricks, see: How To Keep On Keeping On… Long Term!
Staying in the flow
…is not usually a problem, you would think, because “…and just keep doing it, at peak performance level” but the fact is, sometimes we get kicked out of our flow by something external. We covered some of that in the above-linked “How To Keep On Keeping On” article, such as figuring out showstoppers in advance (for example, “if I get an injury, I will rest until it is healed”) and ideally, back-up plans.
For example, let’s say you have your dietary plan all worked out, then you are invited to someone’s birthday celebration a couple of weeks in, and you don’t want to rain on their parade, so you figure out for yourself in advance how you are going to mitigate any harm to your plans, e.g. “I will simply choose the healthiest option available, and not worry if it doesn’t meet my usual standards” or “I will simply fast” if that’s an appropriate thing for you (for some it might be, for some it might not be).
For more on this, see:
How To Avoid Slipping Into (Bad) Old Habits
Take care!
Don’t Forget…
Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!
Learn to Age Gracefully
Join the 98k+ American women taking control of their health & aging with our 100% free (and fun!) daily emails:
-
The 5 Resets – by Dr. Aditi Nerurkar
10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.
What this book isn’t: an advice to go on a relaxing meditation retreat, or something like that.
What this is: a science-based guide to what actually works.
There’s no need to be mysterious, so we’ll mention that the titular “5 resets” are:
- What matters most
- Quiet in a noisy world
- Leveraging the brain-body connection
- Coming up for air (regaining perspective)
- Bringing your best self forward
All of these are things we can easily lose sight of in the hustle and bustle of daily life, so having a system for keeping them on track can make a huge difference!
The style is personable and accessible, while providing a lot of strongly science-backed tips and tricks along the way.
Bottom line: if life gets away from you a little too often for comfort, this book can help you keep on top of things with a lot less stress.
Click here to check out “The 5 Resets”, and take control with conscious calm!
Don’t Forget…
Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!
Learn to Age Gracefully
Join the 98k+ American women taking control of their health & aging with our 100% free (and fun!) daily emails: