The Joy Of Missing Out

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What this is not going to be: a sour grapes thing.

What this is going to be: an exploration of how the grass is greener on the other side of the fence wherever you water it

It’s easy to feel lonely and isolated, even in today’s increasingly-connected world. We’ve tackled that topic before:

How To Beat Loneliness & Isolation

One of the more passive (but still reasonable) ways of reducing isolation is to simply say “yes” more, which we discussed (along with other more active strategies) here:

When The World Moves Without Us… Can We Side-Step Age-Related Alienation?

But, is there any benefit to be gained from not being in the thick of things?

Sometimes some things associated with isolation are not, in reality, necessarily isolating. See for example:

Singledom & Healthy Longevity

But, the implications of embracing the “joy of missing out” are much more wide-reaching:

Wherever you are, there you are

You’ve probably read before the phrase “wherever you go, there you are”, but this phrasing brings attention to the fact that you already are where you are.

There are quite possibly aspects of your current life/situation that are not ideal, but take a moment to appreciate where you are in life. At the very least, you are probably in a safe warm dry house with plenty of food available; chances are you have plenty of luxuries too.

See also: How To Get Your Brain On A More Positive Track (Without Toxic Positivity)

And yet, it’s easy to have a fear of missing out. Even billionaires fear they do not have enough and must acquire more in order to be truly secure and fulfilled.

As it goes for material wealth, so it also goes for social wealth—in other words, we may worry about such questions as: on whom can we rely, and who will be there for us if we need them? Do we, ultimately, have enough social capital to be secure?

  • For social media influencers, it’ll be follower counts and engagement.
  • For the family-oriented, it might be the question of whose house a given holiday gets celebrated at, and who attends, and who does it best.
  • In more somber matters, think about funerals, and those where “there was such a huge turnout” vs “almost nobody attended”.

It sure sounds a lot like a dog-eat-dog world in which missing out sucks! But it doesn’t have to.

So let’s recap: your current situation is probably, all things considered, not bad. There is probably much in life to enjoy. If people do not come to your holiday event, then those are not people who would have improved things for you. If people do not attend your funeral even, then well, you yourself will be late, so hey.

Right now though, you are alive, so…

Enjoy the moment; enjoy your life for you.

Invest in yourself. Better yourself. Improve your environment for yourself little by little.

We spend a lot of time in life living up to everyone’s expectations, often without stopping to question whether it is what we want, or sometimes putting aside what we want in favor of what is wanted of us.

  • Sometimes, such ostensible altruism is laudable and good (the point of today’s article is not “be a selfish jerk”; sometimes we should indeed shelve our self-interest in favour of doing something for the common good)
  • Sometimes, it’s just pointless sacrifice that benefits nobody (the point of today’s article is “there is no point in playing stressful, stacked games when you could have a better time not doing that”)

If you are about to embark on an endeavor that you don’t really want to, take a moment to seriously consider which of the above two situations this is, and then act accordingly.

For a deeper dive into that, you might like this book that we reviewed a while back:

The Joy of Saying No – by Natalie Lue

Enjoy!

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  • Are Supplements Worth Taking?
    Q&A Thursday: Do you need supplements? We tackle vitamins, diet vs. pills, and when to see a doctor for deficiencies. Plus, exotic foods as nature’s supplements!

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  • Chair Stretch Workout Guide

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    It’s Q&A Day at 10almonds!

    Have a question or a request? You can always hit “reply” to any of our emails, or use the feedback widget at the bottom!

    In cases where we’ve already covered something, we might link to what we wrote before, but will always be happy to revisit any of our topics again in the future too—there’s always more to say!

    As ever: if the question/request can be answered briefly, we’ll do it here in our Q&A Thursday edition. If not, we’ll make a main feature of it shortly afterwards!

    So, no question/request too big or small

    ❝The 3 most important exercises don’t work if you can’t get on the floor. I’m 78, and have knee replacements. What about 3 best chair yoga stretches? Love your articles!❞

    Here are six!

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  • How To Rebuild Your Cartilage

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    We’ve covered before the topic of wear-and-tear on joints such as:

    Avoiding/Managing Osteoarthritis

    But what of cartilage, in particular? A common belief is “once it’s gone, it’s gone”, but that’s not quite right.

    Cartilage is living tissue (metabolically active, with living cells). Within this tissue, specialist cells called chondrocytes produce extracellular cartilage matrix and collagen fibers, which provide smooth joint gliding as well as shock absorption.

    Is exercise good or bad for cartilage?

    Yes, yes it is. Exercise is good or bad for cartilage depending on the details:

    • High-impact exercise e.g. running, jumping) places stress on cartilage, which is broadly bad
    • However, impact loading strengthens the subchondral bone plate (layer under cartilage)

    Strengthening this bone layer can help in long-term adaptation for high-impact sports.

    See also: Resistance Is Useful! (Especially As We Get Older)

    So, how to do that without wiping out your cartilage first?

    Building up

    A gradual process is what’s called-for here:

    1. Start with cyclic, non-impact moderate resistance exercises (e.g. cycling, rowing, swimming).
    2. Gradually add soft-impact loading (e.g. fast walking, soft jogging).
    3. Incorporate strength training to improve overall joint stability (e.g. leg press, for lower body joints)
    4. Slowly transition to running and jumping over a long period to allow tissues to adapt.

    How exactly you go about that is a matter of personal taste, but here are some illustrative examples:

    • Indoor* cycling
    • Cross trainer
    • Leg press machine
    • Tennis

    *Why indoor? It’s so that you can control the resistance level at the twist of a knob, and get on and off when you want.

    See also: Treadmill vs Road ← for similar considerations when it comes to walking/running. Outdoor definitely has its advantages, but so does indoor!

    And the very related: How To Do HIIT (Without Wrecking Your Body)

    Note that HIIT is High Intensity Interval Training, not High Impact Interval Training!

    Strength from the inside

    One of the most important things for cartilage is collagen. You can supplement that, or if you’re vegetarian/vegan, you can take its constituent parts to improve your own synthesis of it.

    See: Collagen For Your Skin, Joints, & Bones: We Are Such Stuff As Fish Are Made Of

    Another supplement that can be helpful is glucosamine & chondroitin, which is best taken alongside a good omega-3 intake:

    Effects of Glucosamine and Chondroitin Sulfate on Cartilage Metabolism in OA: Outlook on Other Nutrient Partners Especially Omega-3 Fatty Acids

    Want to know more?

    This book is technically about (re)building strength and mobility in the case of arthritis specifically, but if your joints have more wear than you’d like, you may find this one an invaluable resource:

    Yoga Therapy for Arthritis: A Whole-Person Approach to Movement and Lifestyle – by Dr. Steffany Moonaz & Erin Byron

    Take care!

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  • Healthy Eating, With Rural Food Availabilities

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    It’s Q&A Day at 10almonds!

    Have a question or a request? We love to hear from you!

    In cases where we’ve already covered something, we might link to what we wrote before, but will always be happy to revisit any of our topics again in the future too—there’s always more to say!

    No question/request too big or small 😎

    ❝Informtation about healthy food that doesn’t need obscure ingredients, things we can’t get in rural areas❞

    Great suggestion, as we do have many readers who (like yourself, presumably) live in such places!

    Generally speaking, what we try to do is give the most universally applicable health information possible, and trust people to apply that in the context of what’s available to them.

    One of the reasons it’s hard to tailor dietary information to exclude “obscure” ingredients is that “obscure” is relative and subjective. Sometimes, one reader’s “what is this weird food I’ve never heard of?” is another reader’s everpresent staple!

    So, while we can’t whip up a menu based on the products available in your local store without having an inventory of your local store, what we can do is offer some guiding principles:

    Do what you can

    It’s tempting to be sad that certain things aren’t locally available. This writer has a friend who often sends recipes that call for locally unavailable specific Middle Eastern and/or Surinamese* ingredients, and yes, it’s unfortunate.

    *Which this writing software thinks is so obscure it did not even recognize the word “Surinamese” and highlighted it as a spelling mistake.

    However, it’s best to focus on what is available, and work with that where possible.

    Substitute or skip?

    Sometimes, if you can’t get something fresh, canned or frozen or dried is fine. Sometimes it isn’t (in culinary terms, anyway; it’s almost always fine in nutrition terms, unless it’s lettuce or something in which case yes, only fresh will do).

    Experiment, find out what works and what doesn’t. In the worst case scenario, you’ll have a disappointing meal once and not repeat that one.

    Sometimes, the “inferior” choices work better! See for example: Super-Nutritious Shchi ← in this one, those dried herbs? They work better than fresh. The fresh herbs would give it a slightly sweeter taste that’s not appropriate here. And guess what, the Russian peasants who invented this dish did not have fresh rosemary and thyme (which grow nicely in a Mediterranean climate, and not so well in Siberia, say). Those tomatoes? We use fresh in the recipe there and it’s fine, but actually canned cherry tomatoes work great too.

    On which note…

    People think of “canned foods” as meaning “processed foods” and therefore bad. But the reality is it’s all dependent on what’s in the can (check the ingredients!). And as for nutrients?

    Many canned fruits and vegetables contain more nutrients than fresh ones! This is because the way they’ve been stored preserves them better. For example:

    • Canned tomatoes contain more bioavailable lycopene than fresh
    • Canned spinach contains more bioavailable carotene than fresh
    • Canned corn contains more bioavailable lutein than fresh
    • The list goes on, but you get the idea!

    Learn more: Nutrient Retention During Canned Food Production

    Count the plant types

    Getting at least 30 different types of plant in your diet each week is associated with much better health outcomes than not doing that.

    It is not, in fact, a number out of a hat. It’s from a big (n=11,336) study into what things affect the gut microbiome for better or for worse. It was an observational population study, championing “citizen science” in which volunteers tracked various things and collected and sent in various samples for analysis.

    The most significant finding of this study was that those who consumed more than 30 different kinds of plants per week, had a much better gut microbiome than those who consumed fewer than 10 different kinds of plants per week (there is a bell curve at play, and it gets steep around 10 and 30):

    American Gut: an Open Platform for Citizen Science Microbiome Research

    You can read more about it, here: What’s Your Plant Diversity Score?

    Does it sound hard to get in 30 different plants, without good local availability?

    In this writer’s pantry alone (so, only shelf-stable goods), there are (by coincidence, literally just counted them now) precisely 30 different kinds of plants, mostly in the form of various canned, jarred/fermented, or dried goods.

    And that’s without counting herbs and spices (which would add another 21 to the tally).

    Now, your local availability will differ from this writer’s, but we’re willing to bet that your local stores have a lot of different canned, jarred/fermented, or dried goods.

    It’s easy to forget a lot of them are plants, if you’re only thinking of greenery and such. For example, nuts are plants! Canned beans/pulses are plants! Lentils are plants! Grains are plants! And so forth.

    Minimize the bad

    We generally advocate for focusing on adding healthy things more than eliminating unhealthy things, and we stand by that as a generally more useful principle, and certainly one that’s a lot easier to act on (and after all, dietary information is only useful if you actually implement it).

    That said, there’s a strong case to be made for skipping alcohol, reducing sugar and salt, things like that. And those tweaks are usually things that one can do almost anywhere.

    Keep your menu fresh, even if the ingredients aren’t

    Variety’s important psychologically, not just nutritionally, and at the end of the day you’ll probably only do what doesn’t feel like a terrible chore.

    So, with that in mind…

    Sick of eating the same things? 5 ways to boost your nutrition and keep meals interesting and healthy

    Enjoy!

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  • How To Quickly Repair A Broken Skin Barrier

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    Dr. Shereene Idris, dermatologist, shows us what we can do at home:

    Saving face

    We say that, since of course the face, being some of the most sensitive skin on the human body and yet at the same time the most habitually exposed, it’s usually the site of such problems as a broken skin barrier.

    First though, what actually is the skin barrier? It’s the outermost part of the epidermis (the stratum corneum) that protects against pollution, pathogens, and moisture loss; it’s made of skin cells (the “bricks”) and a lipid matrix (the “mortar”) of ceramides, cholesterol, and fatty acids, topped by an acid mantle that maintains a pH of about 5–5.5.

    However, overuse of exfoliants, retinol, or random serums can strip the barrier, leading to redness, tightness, peeling, dryness, itching, burning, and breakouts.

    Here’s Dr. Idris’s 5-step plan for fixing it:

    1. Stop: stop all products, including sunscreen, moisturizers, and actives; only cleanse with a very gentle cleanser (and if you’re unsure, then just water); protect skin from the sun physically with hats etc instead of sunscreen until healed.
    2. Soothe: use simple occlusives like Vaseline or other petroleum jelly to seal in moisture; if inflammation is strong, apply diaper rash cream (such as Triple Paste) with zinc oxide for extra anti-inflammatory protection.
    3. Restart: after 2–3 days, introduce calming moisturizers containing glycerin, squalane, ceramides, or colloidal oatmeal; avoid hot water and rubbing your face—use lukewarm water and gently pat dry.
    4. Reintroduce: after 1–2 weeks, patch test each of your usual products on a small area for several nights before adding it fully; mild tingling is acceptable, but persistent burning or redness means stop.
    5. Rebuild: start with hydrating and soothing actives such as niacinamide (≤5%) or azelaic acid, then add gentle antioxidants like vitamin C derivatives (e.g. tetrahexyldecyl ascorbate) or coenzyme Q10; later, slowly reintroduce retinol and exfoliating acids (if you use them) on alternating nights, increasing frequency gradually.

    If in doubt, then “less is more” is the principle to go by when it comes to skincare products:

    Click Here If The Embedded Video Doesn’t Load Automatically!

    Want to learn more?

    You might also like:

    “Slugging” Skin Care Routine (Tips From A Dermatologist) ← this is one of the simplest, gentlest approaches possible

    Take care!

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  • An Unexpected Extra Threat Of Alcohol

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    If You Could Use Some Exotic Booze…

    …then for health reasons, we’re going to have to say “nay”.

    We’ve written about alcohol before, and needless to say, it’s not good:

    Can We Drink To Good Health?

    (the answer is “no, we cannot”)

    In fact, the WHO (which unlike government regulatory bodies setting “safe” limits on drinking, makes no profit from taxes on alcohol sales) has declared that “the only safe amount of alcohol is zero”:

    WHO: No level of alcohol consumption is safe for our health

    Up there, where the air is rarefied…

    If you’re flying somewhere this summer (Sinatra-style flying honeymoon or otherwise), you might want to skip the alcohol even if you normally do imbibe, because:

    ❝…even in young and healthy individuals, the combination of alcohol intake with sleeping under hypobaric conditions poses a considerable strain on the cardiac system and might lead to exacerbation of symptoms in patients with cardiac or pulmonary diseases.

    These effects might be even greater in older people; cardiovascular symptoms have a prevalence of 7% of inflight medical emergencies, with cardiac arrest causing 58% of aircraft diversions.❞

    Source: Alcohol plus cabin pressure at higher altitude may threaten sleeping plane passengers’ heart health

    The experiment divided subjects into a control group and a study group; the study group were placed in simulated cabin pressure as though at altitude, which found, when giving some of them two small(we’re talking the kind given on flights) alcoholic drinks:

    ❝The combination of alcohol and simulated cabin pressure at cruising altitude prompted a fall in SpO2 to an average of just over 85% and a compensatory increase in heart rate to an average of nearly 88 beats/minute during sleep.

    In contrast, that was 77 beats/minute for those who had alcohol but weren’t at altitude pressure, or 64 beats/minute for those who neither drank nor were at altitude pressure.

    Lots more metrics were recorded and the study is interesting to read; if you’ve ever slept on a plane and thought “that sleep was not restful at all”, then know: it wasn’t just the seat’s fault, nor the engine, nor the recycled nature of the air—it was the reduced pressure causing hypoxia (defined as having oxygen levels lower than the healthy clinical norm of 90%) and almost halving your sleep’s effectiveness for a less than 10% drop in available oxygen in the blood (the sleepers not at altitude pressure averaged 96% SpO2, compared to the 85% at altitude).

    We say “almost halving” because the deep sleep phase of sleep was reduced from 84 minutes (control) to 67.5 minutes at altitude without alcohol, or 46.5 minutes at altitude with alcohol.

    Again, this was a pressure cabin in a lab—so this wasn’t about the other conditions of an airplane (seats, engine hundreds of other people, etc).

    Which means: in an actual airplane it’s probably even worse.

    Oh, and the study participants? All healthy individuals aged 18–40, so again probably worse for those older (or younger) than that range, or with existing health conditions!

    Want to know more?

    You can read the study in full here:

    Effects of moderate alcohol consumption and hypobaric hypoxia: implications for passengers’ sleep, oxygen saturation and heart rate on long-haul flights

    Want to drop the drink at any altitude? Check out:

    How To Reduce Or Quit Alcohol

    Want to get that vacation feel without alcohol? You’re going to love:

    Mocktails – by Moira Clark (book)

    Enjoy!

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  • Are You A Calorie-Burning Machine?

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    Burn, Calorie, Burn

    In Tuesday’s newsletter, we asked you whether you count calories, and got the above-depicted, below-described set of answers:

    • About 56% said “I am somewhat mindful of calories but keep only a rough tally”
    • About 32% said “I do not count calories / I don’t think it’s important for my health”
    • About 13% said “I rigorously check and record the calories of everything I consume”

    So what does the science say, about the merits of all these positions?

    A food’s calorie count is a good measure of how much energy we will, upon consuming the food, have to use or store: True or False?

    False, broadly. It can be, at best, a rough guideline. Do you know what a calorie actually is, by the way? Most people don’t.

    One thing to know before we get to that: there’s “cal” vs “kcal”. The latter is generally used when it comes to foodstuffs, and it’s what we’ll be meaning whenever we say “calorie” here. 1cal is 1/1000th of a kcal, that’s all.

    Now, for what a calorie actually is:

    A calorie is the amount of energy needed to raise the temperature of 1 liter of water by 1℃

    Question: so, how to we measure how much food is needed to do that?

    Answer: by using a bomb calorimeter! Which is the exciting name for the apparatus used to literally burn food and capture the heat produced to indeed raise the temperature of 1 liter of water by 1℃.

    If you’re having trouble imagining such equipment, here it is:

    Bomb Calorimeter: Definition, Construction, & Operation (with diagram and FAQs)

    The unfortunate implication of the above information

    A kilogram of sawdust contains about a 1000 kcal, give or take what wood was used and various other conditions.

    However, that does not mean you can usefully eat the sawdust. In other words:

    Calorie count tells us only how good something is at raising the temperature of water if physically burned.

    Now do you see why oils and sugars have such comparably high calorie counts?

    And while we may talk about “burning calories” as a metaphor, we do not, in fact, have a little wood stove inside us burning the food we eat.

    A calorie is a calorie: True or False?

    Definitely False! Building on from the above… We will get very little energy from sawdust; it’s not just that we can’t use it; we can’t store it either; it’ll mostly pass through as fiber.

    (however, please do not use sawdust to get your daily dose of fiber either, as it is not safe for human consumption and may give you diseases, depending on what is lurking in it)

    But let’s look at oil and sugar, two very high-calorie categories of food, because they’re really easy to physically burn and they give off a good flame.

    A bomb calorimeter may treat them quite equally, but to our body, they are metabolically very different indeed.

    For a start, most sugars will get absorbed and processed much more quickly than most oils, and that can overwhelm the liver (responsible for glycogen management), and lead to non-alcoholic fatty liver disease, diabetes, and more. Metabolic syndrome in general, and if you keep it up too much and you may find it’s now a lottery between dying of NAFLD, diabetes, or heart disease (it’ll usually be the heart disease that kills).

    See also:

    Meanwhile, we know all about the different kinds of nutritional profiles that oils can have, and some can promote having high energy without putting on fat, while others can strain the heart. Not even “a fat is a fat”, so “a calorie is a calorie” doesn’t get much mileage outside of a bomb calorimeter!

    See also:

    A calorie-controlled / calorie-restricted diet is an effective weight loss strategy: True or False?

    True, usually! Surprise!

    • On the one hand: calories are a wildly imprecise way to reckon the value of food, and using them as a guide to health can be dangerously misleading
    • On the other hand: the very activity of calorie-counting itself promotes mindful eating, which is very good for the health

    There is a strong difference between the mind of somebody who is carefully logging their pre-bedtime piece of chocolate and reflecting on its nutritional value, vs someone who isn’t sure whether this is their second or third glass of wine, nor how much the glass contained.

    So if you want to get most of the benefits of a calorie-controlled diet without counting calories, you may try taking a “mindful eating” approach to diet.

    However! If you want to do this for weight loss, be aware, that you will have to practice it all the time, not just for one meal here and there.

    You can read more on how to do “mindful eating” here:

    Dr. Rupy Aujla: The Kitchen Doctor | Mindful Eating & Interoception

    Take care!

    Don’t Forget…

    Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!

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