Signs That Are Present When Someone Is Dying

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You’ve probably been there a few times, although given the emotional nature of the thing, it’s likely that you weren’t taking notes. Hospice workers, on the other hand, do take notes, so here are some things you might want to know, and if anything makes the next time even a little easier, that’ll be good:

Last stages

Here are the discussed signs of the “active dying” phase:

  • Increasing unconsciousness:
    • The person will be mostly unresponsive most of the time.
    • Eyes may be open or partially open but not making eye contact.
    • Mouth will likely remain open due to muscle relaxation.
  • Cessation of food and water intake
    • The person will likely not eat or drink for several days.
    • This is a natural process and does not cause suffering per se (e.g. thirst, hunger).
    • Dryness of mouth, however, can be treated with a little moistening, for comfort.
  • Changes in breathing
    • Breathing patterns will change and may be irregular.
    • This is a natural metabolic response, and is not a sign of distress.
    • Terminal secretions (“death rattle”) may occur:
      • A gurgling sound caused by saliva buildup due to loss of swallowing reflex.
      • Not painful or distressing for the person.
      • Can be managed by repositioning or using medication to dry secretions.
  • Skin color changes / mottling:
    • First appears on fingers and toes (purple or gray discoloration).
    • May spread to knees, nose, or other extremities.
  • Temperature fluctuations:
    • The body loses its ability to regulate temperature.
    • Person may feel hot but be cold (or vice versa).
    • Fevers are common—cooling measures and/or Tylenol can help.

A person in discomfort may appear restless, have a furrowed brow, or show physical agitation. If on the other hand they appear peaceful and unresponsive, they are almost certainly not in distress. At such times, it’s best to focus on just keeping them clean and comfortable.

For more on all of these, see:

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Want to learn more?

You might also like to read:

Managing Mortality: When Planning Is a Matter of Life and Death

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  • Patient Underwent One Surgery but Was Billed for Two. Even After Being Sued, She Refused To Pay.

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    Jamie Holmes says a surgery center tried to make her pay for two operations after she underwent only one. She refused to buckle, even after a collection agency sued her last winter.

    Holmes, who lives in northwestern Washington state, had surgery in 2019 to have her fallopian tubes tied, a permanent birth-control procedure that her insurance company agreed ahead of time to cover.

    During the operation, while Holmes was under anesthesia, the surgeon noticed early signs of endometriosis, a common condition in which fibrous scar tissue grows around the uterus, Holmes said. She said the surgeon later told her he spent about 15 minutes cauterizing the troublesome tissue as a precaution. She recalls him saying he finished the whole operation within the 60 minutes that had been allotted for the tubal ligation procedure alone.

    She said the doctor assured her the extra treatment for endometriosis would cost her little, if anything.

    Then the bill came.

    The Patient: Jamie Holmes, 38, of Lynden, Washington, who was insured by Premera Blue Cross at the time.

    Medical Services: A tubal ligation operation, plus treatment of endometriosis found during the surgery.

    Service Provider: Pacific Rim Outpatient Surgery Center of Bellingham, Washington, which has since been purchased, closed, and reopened under a new name.

    Total Bill: $9,620. Insurance paid $1,262 to the in-network center. After adjusting for prices allowed under the insurer’s contract, the center billed Holmes $2,605. A collection agency later acquired the debt and sued her for $3,792.19, including interest and fees.

    What Gives: The surgery center, which provided the facility and support staff for her operation, sent a bill suggesting that Holmes underwent two separate operations, one to have her tubes tied and one to treat endometriosis. It charged $4,810 for each.

    Holmes said there were no such problems with the separate bills from the surgeon and anesthesiologist, which the insurer paid.

    Holmes figured someone in the center’s billing department mistakenly thought she’d been on the operating table twice. She said she tried to explain it to the staff, to no avail.

    She said it was as if she ordered a meal at a fast-food restaurant, was given extra fries, and then was charged for two whole meals. “I didn’t get the extra burger and drink and a toy,” she joked.

    Her insurer, Premera Blue Cross, declined to pay for two operations, she said. The surgery center billed Holmes for much of the difference. She refused to pay.

    Holmes said she understands the surgery center could have incurred additional costs for the approximately 15 minutes the surgeon spent cauterizing the spots of endometriosis. About $500 would have seemed like a fair charge to her. “I’m not opposed to paying for that,” she said. “I am opposed to paying for a whole bunch of things I didn’t receive.”

    The physician-owned surgery center was later purchased and closed by PeaceHealth, a regional health system. But the debt was turned over to a collection agency, SB&C, which filed suit against Holmes in December 2023, seeking $3,792.19, including interest and fees.

    The collection agency asked a judge to grant summary judgment, which could have allowed the company to garnish wages from Holmes’ job as a graphic artist and marketing specialist for real estate agents.

    Holmes said she filed a written response, then showed up on Zoom and at the courthouse for two hearings, during which she explained her side, without bringing a lawyer. The judge ruled in February that the collection agency was not entitled to summary judgment, because the facts of the case were in dispute.

    More From Bill Of The Month

    Representatives of the collection agency and the defunct surgery center declined to comment for this article.

    Sabrina Corlette, co-director of Georgetown University’s Center on Health Insurance Reforms, said it was absurd for the surgery center to bill for two operations and then refuse to back down when the situation was explained. “It’s like a Kafka novel,” she said.

    Corlette said surgery center staffers should be accustomed to such scenarios. “It is quite common, I would think, for a surgeon to look inside somebody and say, ‘Oh, there’s this other thing going on. I’m going to deal with it while I’ve got the patient on the operating table.’”

    It wouldn’t have made medical or financial sense for the surgeon to make Holmes undergo a separate operation for the secondary issue, she said.

    Corlette said that if the surgery center was still in business, she would advise the patient to file a complaint with state regulators.

    The Resolution: So far, the collection agency has not pressed ahead with its lawsuit by seeking a trial after the judge’s ruling. Holmes said that if the agency continues to sue her over the debt, she might hire a lawyer and sue them back, seeking damages and attorney fees.

    She could have arranged to pay off the amount in installments. But she’s standing on principle, she said.

    “I just got stonewalled so badly. They treated me like an idiot,” she said. “If they’re going to be petty to me, I’m willing to be petty right back.”

    The Takeaway: Don’t be afraid to fight a bogus medical bill, even if the dispute goes to court.

    Debt collectors often seek summary judgment, which allows them to garnish wages or take other measures to seize money without going to the trouble of proving in a trial that they are entitled to payments. If the consumers being sued don’t show up to tell their side in court hearings, judges often grant summary judgment to the debt collectors.

    However, if the facts of a case are in dispute — for example, because the defendant shows up and argues she owes for just one surgery, not two — the judge may deny summary judgment and send the case to trial. That forces the debt collector to choose: spend more time and money pursuing the debt or drop it.

    “You know what? It pays to be stubborn in situations like this,” said Berneta Haynes, a senior attorney for the National Consumer Law Center who reviewed Holmes’ bill for KFF Health News.

    Many people don’t go to such hearings, sometimes because they didn’t get enough notice, don’t read English, or don’t have time, she said.

    “I think a lot of folks just cave” after they’re sued, Haynes said.

    Emily Siner reported the audio story.

    After six years, we’ll have a final installment with NPR of our Bill of the Month project in the fall. But Bill of the Month will continue at KFF Health News and elsewhere. We still want to hear about your confusing or outrageous medical bills. Visit Bill of the Month to share your story.

    KFF Health News is a national newsroom that produces in-depth journalism about health issues and is one of the core operating programs at KFF—an independent source of health policy research, polling, and journalism. Learn more about KFF.

    Subscribe to KFF Health News’ free Morning Briefing.

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  • Rethinking Exercise: The Workout Paradox

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    The notion of running a caloric deficit (i.e., expending more calories than we consume) to reduce bodyfat is appealing in its simplicity, but… we’d say “it doesn’t actually work outside of a lab”, but honestly, it doesn’t actually work outside of a calculator.

    Why?

    For a start, exercise calorie costs are quite small numbers compared to metabolic base rate. Our brain alone uses a huge portion of our daily calories, and the rest of our body literally never stops doing stuff. Even if we’re lounging in bed and ostensibly not moving, on a cellular level we stay incredibly busy, and all that costs (and the currency is: calories).

    Since that cost is reflected in the body’s budget per kg of bodyweight, a larger body (regardless of its composition) will require more calories than a smaller one. We say “regardless of its composition” because this is true regardless—but for what it’s worth, muscle is more “costly” to maintain than fat, which is one of several reasons why the average man requires more daily calories than the average woman, since on average men will tend to have more muscle.

    And if you do exercise because you want to run out the budget so the body has to “spend” from fat stores?

    Good luck, because while it may work in the very short term, the body will quickly adapt, like an accountant seeing your reckless spending and cutting back somewhere else. That’s why in all kinds of exercise except high-intensity interval training, a period of exercise will be followed by a metabolic slump, the body’s “austerity measures”, to balance the books.

    You may be wondering: why is it different for HIIT? It’s because it changes things up frequently enough that the body doesn’t get a chance to adapt. To labor the financial metaphor, it involves lying to your accountant, so that the compensation is not made. Congratulations: you’re committing calorie fraud (but it’s good for the body, so hey).

    That doesn’t mean other kinds of exercise are useless (or worse, necessarily counterproductive), though! Just, that we must acknowledge that other forms of exercise are great for various aspects of physical health (strengthening the body, mobilizing blood and lymph, preventing disease, enjoying mental health benefits, etc) that don’t really affect fat levels much (which are decided more in the kitchen than the gym—and even in the category of diet, it’s more about what and how and when you eat, rather than how much).

    For more information on metabolic balance in the context of exercise, enjoy:

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  • Pulse – by Jenny Chandler

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    Beans, chickpeas, and lentils are well-established super-healthy foods, but they’re often not a lot of people’s favorite. And why? Usually because of unhappy associations with boring dishes that can barely be called dishes.

    This book raises the bar for pulses of various kinds, and not only provides recipes (180 of them) but also guidelines on principles, tips and tricks, what works and what doesn’t, what makes things better or worse, perfect partners, sprouting, and more.

    The recipes themselves are not all vegan, nor even all vegetarian, but the beans are the star throughout. For those who are vegan or vegetarian, it’s easy to make substitutions, not least of all because the author is generous with “try this instead of that” and “consider also” suggestions, to help us tailor each dish to our personal preferences, and even the desired vibe of a given meal.

    The dishes are neither overly simplistic (it’s not a student survival cookbook, by any means) nor overly complicated; rather, enough is done to make each dish invitingly tasty, and nothing extraneous or pretentious is added for the sake of being fancy. This is about delicious home cooking, nothing more nor less.

    If the book has a weakness, it’s that visual learners will feel the absence of pictures for many recipes. But, the text is clear, the instructions are easy to follow, and a photo for each dish would probably have doubled the cost of the book, at least, while halving the number of recipes.

    Bottom line: if you’d like to get more beans and other pulses in your diet, but are unsure how to make it exciting, this is an excellent option.

    Click here to check out Pulse, and expand your kitchen repertoire!

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    Coming from an eclectic psychotherapy background, Deborah McKenna outlines a wide array of techniques to “do what it says on the tin”, that is:

    Organizing the junk drawer of your mind.

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    The benefit of this is much like the benefit of tidying a room:

    Imagine a kitchen in which half the things have not been put away; there are dishes in the sink, something is growing behind the trash can… and you have a vague suspicion that if you open a certain cupboard, its contents are going to come falling out on your head. How are you going to cook a meal here?

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    Of these, probably the last one is the most critical, and also will have the speediest effects if implemented.

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  • The Origin of Everyday Moods – by Dr. Robert Thayer

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    First of all, what does this title mean by “everyday moods”? By this the author is referring to the kinds of moods we have just as a matter of the general wear-and-tear of everyday life—not the kind that come from major mood disorders and/or serious trauma.

    The latter kinds of mood take less explaining, in any case. Dr. Thayer, therefore, spends his time on the less obvious ones—which in turn are the ones that affect most of the most, every day.

    Critical to Dr. Thayer’s approach is the mapping of moods by four main quadrants:

    1. High energy, high tension
    2. High energy, low tension
    3. Low energy, high tension
    4. Low energy, low tension

    …though this can be further divided into 25 sectors, if we rate each variable on a scale of 0–4. But for the first treatment, it suffices to look at whether energy and tension are high or low, respectively, and which we’d like to have more or less of.

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    Bottom line: if you’d like the cheat codes to improve your moods and lessen the impact of bad ones, this is the book for you.

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