“Edging” is the practice of intentionally delaying orgasm, which can be enjoyed by anyone, with a partner or alone.

On the edge

Urologist Dr. Rena Malik explains:

Question: why?

Answer: the more tension is built up, the stronger the orgasm can be at the end of it. And, even before then, pleasure along the way is pleasure along the way, which is generally considered a good thing—especially for any (usually but not always women, for hormonal and social reasons) who find it difficult to orgasm. It’s also a great way to experiment and learn more about one’s own body and/or that of one’s partner(s), personal responses, and so forth. Also, for any (usually but not always men, for hormonal reasons) who find they usually orgasm sooner than they’d like, it’s a great way to change that, if changing that is what’s wanted.

Bonus answer: for some (usually but not always men, for hormonal reasons) who find they have an uncomfortable slump in mood after orgasm, that can simply be skipped entirely, postponed for another time, etc, with pleasure being derived from the sexual activity rather than orgasm. That way, there’s a lasting dopamine high, with no prolactin crash afterwards ← this is very much tied to male hormones, by the way. If you have female hormones, there’s usually no prolactin crash either way, and instead, the post-orgasm spike in oxytocin is stronger, and a wave of serotonin makes the later decline of dopamine much more gentle.

Question: can it cause any problems?

Answer: yep! Or rather, subjectively, it may be considered so—this is obviously a personal matter and your mileage may vary. The main problem it may cause is that if practised habitually, it may result in greater difficulty achieving orgasm, simply because the body has got used to “ok, when we do this (sex/masturbation), we are in no particular rush to do that (orgasm)”. So whether not this would be a worry for you is down to any given individual. Lastly, if your intent was a long edging session with an orgasm at the end and then something happened to interrupt that, then your orgasm may be unintentionally postponed to another time, which again, may be more or less of an issue depending on your feelings about that.

For more on these things including advice on how to try it, enjoy:

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Want to learn more?

You might also like to read:

• Mythbusting The Big O ← 10almonds main feature on orgasms, health, and associated myths
• Come Together: The Science (and Art) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections – by Dr. Emily Nagoski
• Better Sex Through Mindfulness: How Women Can Cultivate Desire – by Dr. Lori Brotto

Take care!

Dr. Efrat Lamandre makes the case that fibromyalgia is less of a useful diagnosis and more of a rubber stamp, much like the role historically often fulfilled by “heart failure” as an official cause of death (because certainly, that heart sure did stop beating). It’s a way of answering the question without answering the question.

…and what to look for instead

Fibromyalgia is characterized by chronic pain, tenderness, sleep disturbances, fatigue, and other symptoms. It’s often considered an “invisible” illness, because it’s the kind that’s easy to dismiss if you’re not the one carrying it. A broken leg, one can point at and see it’s broken; a respiratory infection, one can see its effects and even test for presence of the pathogen and/or its antigens. But fibromyalgia? “It hurts and I’m tired” doesn’t quite cut it.

Much like “heart failure” as a cause of death when nothing else is indicated, fibromyalgia is a diagnosis that gets applied when known causes of chronic pain have been ruled out.

Dr. Lamandre advocates for functional medicine and seeking the underlying causes of the symptoms, rather than the industry standard approach, which is to just manage the symptoms themselves with medications (of course, managing the symptoms with medications has its place; there is no need to suffer needlessly if pain relief can be used; it’s just not a sufficient response).

She notes that potential triggers for fibromyalgia include microbiome imbalances, food sensitivities, thyroid issues, nutrient deficiencies, adrenal fatigue, mitochondrial dysfunction, mold toxicity, Lyme disease, and more. Is this really just one illness? Maybe, but quite possibly not.

In short… If you are given a diagnosis of fibromyalgia, she advises that you insist doctors keep on looking, because that’s not an answer.

For more on all of this, enjoy:

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Want to learn more?

You might also like to read:

• Managing Chronic Pain (Realistically!)
• How To Eat To Beat Chronic Fatigue ← yes, including how to do so when you are chronically fatigued. In other words, this isn’t just dietary advice, but rather practical advice too
• When Painkillers Aren’t Helping, These Things Might

Take care!