Languishing – by Prof. Corey Keyes

10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

We’ve written before about depression and “flourishing” but what about when one isn’t exactly flourishing, but is not necessarily in the depths of depression either? That’s what this book is about.

Prof. Keyes offers, from his extensive research, hope for those who do not check enough of the boxes to be considered depressed, but who are also definitely more in the lane of “surviving” than “thriving”.

Specifically, he outlines five key ways to make the step from languishing to flourishing, based not on motivational rhetoric, but actual data-based science:

  1. Learn (creating your personal story of self-growth)
  2. Connect (building relationships, on the individual level and especially on the community level)
  3. Transcend (developing psychological resilience to the unexpected)
  4. Help (others! This is about finding your purpose, and then actively living it)
  5. Play (this is a necessary “recharge” element that many people miss, especially as we get older)

With regard to finding one’s purpose being given the one-word summary of “help”, this is a callback to our tribal origins, and how we thrive and flourish best and feel happiest when we have a role to fulfil and provide value to those around us)

Bottom line: if you’re not at the point of struggling to get out of bed each day, but you’re also not exactly leaping out of bed with a smile, this book can help get you from one place to the other.

Click here to check out Languishing, and flourish instead!

Don’t Forget…

Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!

Recommended

  • The Two-Second Advantage – by Vivek Ranadive and Kevin Maney
  • South Indian-Style Chickpea & Mango Salad
    Spice up your mealtime with a heart-healthy, cholesterol-fighting chickpea dish packed with flavorful spices and fresh mango zing. Enjoy a bonus boost for your diet!

Learn to Age Gracefully

Join the 98k+ American women taking control of their health & aging with our 100% free (and fun!) daily emails:

  • The Gym For Your Mental Health

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    Getting The Most Out Of Therapy

    If you’ve never had therapy, what image do you have of it? Perhaps you imagine a bearded and bespectacled man in a suit, impassively making notes on a clipboard. Perhaps you imagine an empathetic woman, with tissues and camomile tea on standby.

    The reality is: the experience of therapy can vary, a lot.

    In its results, too! Sometimes we may try therapy and think “well that was a waste of time and money”. Sometimes we may try therapy and it’ll change our life.

    So… Is there any way to make it less of a lottery?

    First: knowledge is power

    And while the therapist-client relationship certainly shouldn’t be a power struggle, you do want to be empowered.

    So, read about different styles of therapy, and also, read some how-to guides for self-therapy. We’ve recommended some before in previous editions of 10almonds; you can check those books out here:

    This will serve two purposes:

    • You’ll know what to expect out of a therapist
    • You can more efficiently “get to work” in therapy

    It also, of course, could help you already, without even going to therapy!

    Second: begin with the end in mind

    A person who does not know what they want to get out of therapy, will likely not get much out of therapy. Or rather, their first task will be to figure that out. So, figure it out in advance, if you can.

    Maybe you have a problem that has a specific name, for example poor self-esteem, anxiety, stress, depression, trauma, neuroticism, phobia, etc.

    This isn’t Alcoholics Anonymous, and in this case you don’t want a lifetime of “Hello, my name is ______ and I have ______”, if you can help it.

    So, what do you want?

    • Maybe you want to be able to go to social events without feeling anxious
    • Maybe you want your relationship(s) to be more secure and fulfilling
    • Maybe you want to no longer have nightmares about that traumatic thing
    • Maybe you want to be able to greet each day’s tasks with confidence and without overwhelm

    …etc.

    A good therapist will help you to set such goals (if you haven’t already), and attain them.

    If you’re going the self-therapy route, then this is your job now!

    It will probably start with the question: imagine that everything currently troubling you is now healed.

    What would that look like, to you?

    Third: get a good match for you

    Unless you are going entirely the self-therapy route (which can work for some), you will want a therapist who’s a good match for you.

    It may take a degree of “suck it and see” trial runs before you find the right one, but that takes time and money, so you’ll want to streamline the process as much as you can. If you do this well, you may be able to find a good therapist for you first time.

    For this, personal recommendations (such as from friends) may help more than exmaining academic and institutional affiliations.

    Yes, you want a well-qualified therapist who is a member in good standing of a respectable regulated body… but whether your therapist is easy for you to “get on with” will matter at least as much as whether their approach is psychodynamic, or 4th wave CBT, or IFS, or whatever seems popular in your time and place.

    Bear in mind:

    • Some therapists are specialized in helping with some kinds of things and not others. It will obviously help if the therapist you choose is specialized in the thing you are seeking help for.
    • Some therapists may be able to relate to you better (or not), based on simple factors of who they are. To this end, while your therapist certainly doesn’t have to be a mirror image of you, factors like age, gender, race, etc can be relevant and may be worth considering, depending on what you are seeking help with, and what factors impact that thing.

    Prefer keeping things to yourself?

    Therapy isn’t for everyone, but having a good relationship with oneself definitely is. You might want to invest in one of the books whose reviews we linked above, and you might also get value from previous Psychology Sunday articles, which you can find in our archive (every seventh edition here has a Psychology Sunday main feature):

    Click Here To Check Out The 10almonds Archive

    To borrow the catchphrase of Dr. Kirk Honda (a therapist and therapy educator with decades of experience):

    ❝Take care of yourself, because you deserve it; you really, really do.❞

    Share This Post

  • Just One Heart – by Dr. Jonathan Fisher

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    First, what this is not: a book to say eat fiber, go easy on the salt, get some exercise, and so forth.

    What this rather is: a book about the connection between the heart and mind; often written poetically, the simple biological reality is that our emotional state does have a genuine impact on our heart health, and as such, any effort to look after our heart (healthwise) would be incomplete without an effort to look after our heart (emotionally).

    Dr. Fisher talks about the impact of stress and uncertainty, as well as peace and security, on heart health—and then, having sorted emotional states into “heart breakers” and “heart wakers”, he goes about laying out a plan for what is, emotionally and thus also physiologically, good for our heart.

    Chapter by chapter, he walks us through the 7 principles to live by:

    1. Steadiness: how to steady your heart amid chaos
    2. Wisdom: how to develop a wise heart in uncertain times
    3. Openness: how to safely open your heart in a threatening world
    4. Wholeness: how to show up with your whole heart without going to pieces
    5. Courage: how to lead with a courageous heart when fear surrounds you
    6. Lightness: how to live with a light heart in a heavy world
    7. Warmth: how to love with a warm heart when life feels cold

    The style is anything but clinical; it’s well-written, certainly, and definitely informed in part by his medical understanding of the heart, but it’s entirely the raw human element that shines throughout, and that makes the ideas a lot more tangible.

    Bottom line: if you’d like your heart to be healthy (cardiac health) and your heart to be healthy (emotional health), this book is a very worthwhile read.

    Click here to check out Just One Heart, and take care of yours!

    Share This Post

  • The Foot Book – by Dr. Todd Brennan & Dr. Leslie Johnston

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    This book really is what the subtitle claims it to be: “everything you need to know to take care of your feet”.

    Arthritis, bunions, corns, diabetes, eczema, fungus, gout, heel pain, ingrown toenails, joint issues, and that’s just one item for each of the first 10 letters of the alphabet.

    There’s a lot in here; the point is that it covers everything from the “serious” to the “cosmetic”, so whether you want to be a foot model for an expensive perfume company or just want to walk without pain, the answer is probably in here.

    The goal of this book is to be comprehensive like that, and also with an open agenda to educate the world as to what it actually is that podiatrists do (hint: their years of medical school and further training in residency are not just so that they can trim toenails nicely).

    The style is very light and readable, as one might expect from a pair of doctors with many years of experience of explaining exactly these things to patients every day.

    Bottom line: if you have feet and would like them to be/remain in good condition, this book is an invaluable resource!

    Click here to check out The Foot Book, and take good care of yours!

    Share This Post

Related Posts

  • The Two-Second Advantage – by Vivek Ranadive and Kevin Maney
  • Healing Your Gut: Anastasia’s Journey and Tips

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    Anastasia Gurova shares her inspiring journey from chronic gut issues to vibrant health.

    A Personal Journey to Gut Health

    In the below video, Anastasia shares her long struggle with gut problems, including SIBO, IBS, and gastritis. She talks about ending up in the hospital with severe bloating, only to find that a range of medical approaches didn’t provide her with any lasting relief. This led her to explore the importance of the microbiome and its crucial role in gut health, which is what we’ll be focusing on in this overview.

    Key Insights and Tips

    The most valuable parts of Anastasia’s story for 10almonds readers are, in our opinion, the solutions she discovered to her gut issues. You’ll have to watch her video to discover all of them, but here are some of our favorites:

    • Reintroduce Whole Grains and Legumes: Despite the popularity of grain-free diets, Anastasia found significant improvements in her gut health by adding whole grains like quinoa, oats, and buckwheat back into her diet. These foods provide essential fibers that feed beneficial gut bacteria.
    • Soaking and Fermenting Foods: To make grains and legumes more digestible, Anastasia recommends soaking them overnight. This is similar to the common technique people use on oats. She also includes fermented foods like sauerkraut, kimchi, and yogurt in her diet, which introduce beneficial bacteria to the gut.
    • Resistant Starches: Foods like cooked and cooled rice, potatoes, and green bananas contain resistant starches that promote healthy gut bacteria. Anastasia emphasizes incorporating these into meals to support gut health.
    • Mindful Eating: Anastasia found that taking time to chew food thoroughly and savor each bite helped improve her digestion. She avoids distractions like TV while eating and pays attention to the textures and flavors of her meals.
    • Avoid Overly Restrictive Diets: Anastasia warns against overly restrictive diets like keto and strict SIBO diets that cut out all carbs and fiber. These can worsen gut health by starving beneficial bacteria.

    That’s Only The Beginning

    Anastasia’s video goes far beyond what we’ve covered in this short introduction; she provides a detailed look at the steps she took, from dietary changes to lifestyle adjustments, and offers tips that anyone can apply. Plus, she explains the science behind these changes, which, of course, we love.

    Enjoy the video! (It would be remiss for us to not bring up our general intro to gut health, or our more specific article on the gut-brain connection)

    Good luck on your gut-health journey!

    Don’t Forget…

    Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!

    Learn to Age Gracefully

    Join the 98k+ American women taking control of their health & aging with our 100% free (and fun!) daily emails:

  • Beetroot vs Sweet Potato – Which is Healthier?

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    Our Verdict

    When comparing beetroot to sweet potato, we picked the sweet potato.

    Why?

    Quite a straightforward one today!

    In terms of macros, sweet potato has more protein, carbs, and fiber. The glycemic index of both of these root vegetables is similar (and in each case varies similarly depending on how it is cooked), so we’ll call the winner the one that’s more nutritionally dense—the sweet potato.

    Looking at vitamins next, beetroot has more vitamin B9 (and is in fact a very good source of that, unlike sweet potato), and/but sweet potato is a lot higher in vitamins A, B1, B2, B3, B5, B6, B7, C, E, K, and choline. And we’re talking for example more than 582x more vitamin A, more than 17x more vitamin E, more than a 10x more vitamin K, and at least multiples more of the other vitamins mentioned. So this category’s not a difficult one to call for sweet potato.

    When it comes to minerals, beetroot has more selenium, while sweet potato has more calcium, copper, magnesium, manganese, phosphorus, and potassium. They’re approximately equal in iron and zinc. Another win for sweet potato.

    Of course, enjoy both. But if you’re looking for the root vegetable that’ll bring the most nutrients, it’s the sweet potato.

    Want to learn more?

    You might like to read:

    No, beetroot isn’t vegetable Viagra. But here’s what else it can do

    Take care!

    Don’t Forget…

    Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!

    Learn to Age Gracefully

    Join the 98k+ American women taking control of their health & aging with our 100% free (and fun!) daily emails:

  • The Power of Fun – by Catherine Price

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    It’s said that nobody’s dying regret is to wish they’d spent more time at the office, yet many of don’t make enough time for fun.

    This book has been published with two different subtitles:

    • Why fun is the key to a happy and healthy life
    • How to feel alive again

    One offers a sensible reason to read this book; the other offers a deeply emotional reason. Both are entirely valid.

    Catherine Price sets out in this work to identify what fun actually is (she puts it at the intersection of playfulness, connection and flow) and how to have more of it (she gives a five-step method to build and integrate it into life).

    In the category of criticism, this 334-page book is (in this reviewer’s opinion) a little padded and could have been an article instead. But the advice contained within it is sound, and the impact it can have might be profound.

    Bottom line: if you find you’ve settled into a routine that’s perhaps comfortable, but not actually that much fun, this book will help you to liven things up.

    Click here to check out The Power Of Fun, and feel more alive!

    Don’t Forget…

    Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!

    Learn to Age Gracefully

    Join the 98k+ American women taking control of their health & aging with our 100% free (and fun!) daily emails: