Imposter Syndrome (and why almost everyone has it)

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Imposter Syndrome (and why almost everyone has it)

Imposter syndrome is the pervasive idea that we’re not actually good enough, people think we are better than we are, and at any moment we’re going to get found out and disappoint everyone.

Beyond the workplace

Imposter syndrome is most associated with professionals. It can range from a medical professional who feels like they’ve been projecting an image of confidence too much, to a writer or musician who is sure that their next piece will never live up to the acclaim of previous pieces and everyone will suddenly realize they don’t know what they’re doing, to a middle-manager who feels like nobody above or below them realizes how little they know how to do.

But! Less talked-about (but no less prevalent) is imposter syndrome in other areas of life. New parents tend to feel this strongly, as can the “elders” of a family that everyone looks to for advice and strength and support. Perhaps worst is when the person most responsible for the finances of a household feels like everyone just trusts them to keep everything running smoothly, and maybe they shouldn’t because it could all come crashing down at any moment and everyone will see them for the hopeless shambles of a human being that they really are.

Feelings are not facts

And yet (while everyone makes mistakes sometimes) the reality is that we’re all doing our best. Given that imposter syndrome affects up to 82% of people, let’s remember to have some perspective. Everyone feels like they’re winging it sometimes. Everyone feels the pressure.

Well, perhaps not everyone. There’s that other 18%. Some people are sure they’re the best thing ever. Then again, there’s probably some in that 18% that actually feel worse than the 82%—they just couldn’t admit it, even in an anonymized study.

But one thing’s for sure: it’s very, very common. Especially in high-performing women, by the way, and people of color. In other words, people who typically “have to do twice as much to get recognized as half as good”.

That said, the flipside of this is that people who are not in any of those categories may feel “everything is in my favor, so I really have no excuse to not achieve the most”, and can sometimes take very extreme actions to try to avoid perceived failure, and it can be their family that pays the price.

Things to remember

If you find imposter syndrome nagging at you, remember these things:

  • There are people far less competent than you, doing the same thing
  • Nobody knows how to do everything themselves, especially at first
  • If you don’t know how to do something, you can usually find out
  • There is always someone to ask for help, or at least advice, or at least support

At the end of the day, we evolved to eat fruit and enjoy the sun. None of us are fully equipped for all the challenges of the modern world, but if we do our reasonable best, and look after each other (and that means that you too, dear reader, deserve looking after as well), we can all do ok.

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  • Healthiest-Three-Nut Butter

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    We’re often telling you to “diversify your nuts”, so here’s a great way to get in three at once with no added sugar, palm oil, or preservatives, and only the salt you choose to put in. We’ve picked three of the healthiest nuts around, but if you happen to be allergic, don’t worry, we’ve got you covered too.

    You will need

    • 1 cup almonds (if allergic, substitute a seed, e.g. chia, and make it ½ cup)
    • 1 cup walnuts (if allergic, substitute a seed, e.g. pumpkin, and make it ½ cup)
    • 1 cup pistachios (if allergic, substitute a seed, e.g. poppy, and make it ½ cup)
    • 1 tbsp almond oil (if allergic, substitute extra virgin olive oil) (if you prefer sweet nut butter, substitute 1 tbsp maple syrup; the role here is to emulsify the nuts, and this will do the same job)
    • Optional: ¼ tsp MSG or ½ tsp low-sodium salt

    Method

    (we suggest you read everything at least once before doing anything)

    1a) If using nuts, heat your oven to 350℉ / 180℃. Place the nuts on a baking tray lined with baking paper, and bake/roast for about 10 minutes, but keep an eye on it to ensure the nuts don’t burn, and jiggle them if necessary to ensure they toast evenly. Once done, allow to cool.

    1b) If using seeds, you can either omit that step, or do the same for 5 minutes if you want to, but really it’s not necessary.

    2) Blend all ingredients (nuts/seeds, oil, MSG/salt) in a high-speed blender. Note: this will take about 10 minutes in total, and we recommend you do it in 30-second bursts so as to not overheat the motor. You also may need to periodically scrape the mixture down the side of the blender, to ensure a smooth consistency.

    3) Transfer to a clean jar, and enjoy at your leisure:

    Enjoy!

    Want to learn more?

    For those interested in some of the science of what we have going on today:

    Take care!

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  • Peach vs Papaya – Which is Healthier?

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    Our Verdict

    When comparing peach to papaya, we picked the peach.

    Why?

    It was close!

    In terms of macros, there’s not much between them; they are close to identical on protein, carbs, and fiber. Technically peach has slightly more protein (+0.4g/100g) and papaya has slightly more carbs and fiber (+1.28g/100g carbs, +0.2g/100g fiber), but since the differences are so tiny, we’re calling this section a tie—bearing in mind, these numbers are based on averages, which means that when they’re very close, they’re meaningless—one could easily, for example, pick up a peach that has more fiber than a papaya, because that 0.2g/100g is well within the margin of variation. So, as we say: a tie.

    When it comes to vitamins, things are also close; peaches have more of vitamins B1, B2, B3, and E, while papaya has more of vitamins A, B6, B9, and C. This is a 4:4 tie, but since the most notable margin of difference is vitamin C (of which papayas have 9x more) while the others are much closer, we’ll call this a tie-breaker win for papaya.

    The category of minerals sets things apart more: peaches have more copper, iron, manganese, phosphorus, potassium, and zinc, while papaya has more calcium, magnesium, and selenium. That’s already a 6:3 win for peaches, before we take into account that the numbers for papaya’s calcium and selenium are tiny, so adding this to the already 6:3 win for peaches makes for a clear and easy win for peaches in this category.

    Adding up the sections is 1W/1D/1L for both fruits, but looking at the win/loss for each, it’s clear which won/lost on a tiebreaker, and which won/lost by a large margin, so peaches get the victory here.

    Of course, enjoy either or both, though! And see below for a bonus feature of peaches:

    Want to learn more?

    You might like to read:

    Top 8 Fruits That Prevent & Kill Cancer ← peaches are high on this list! They kill cancer cells while sparing healthy ones 🙂

    Take care!

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  • The Uses of Delusion – by Dr. Stuart Vyse

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    Most of us try to live rational lives. We try to make the best decisions we can based on the information we have… And if we’re thoughtful, we even try to be aware of common logical fallacies, and overcome our personal biases too. But is self-delusion ever useful?

    Dr. Stuart Vyse, psychologist and Fellow for the Committee for Skeptical Inquiry, argues that it can be.

    From self-fulfilling prophecies of optimism and pessimism, to the role of delusion in love and loss, Dr. Vyse explores what separates useful delusion from dangerous irrationality.

    We also read about such questions as (and proposed answers to):

    • Why is placebo effect stronger if we attach a ritual to it?
    • Why are negative superstitions harder to shake than positive ones?
    • Why do we tend to hold to the notion of free will, despite so much evidence for determinism?

    The style of the book is conversational, and captivating from the start; a highly compelling read.

    Bottom line: if you’ve ever felt yourself wondering if you are deluding yourself and if so, whether that’s useful or counterproductive, this is the book for you!

    Click here to check out The Uses of Delusion, and optimize yours!

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Related Posts

  • Body Language (In The Real World)
  • Blueberries vs Elderberries – Which is Healthier?

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    Our Verdict

    When comparing blueberries to elderberries, we picked the elderberries.

    Why?

    Both are certainly top-tier fruits! But…

    In terms of macros, elderberries have more than 2x the fiber, while the two berries are approximately equal on other macros. An easy win for elderberries in this category.

    In the category of vitamins, blueberries have more of vitamins E, K, and choline, while elderberries have more of vitamins A, B1, B2, B3, B5, B6, B7, B9, and C, scoring another win for elderberries here.

    When it comes to minerals, blueberries have more magnesium, manganese, and zinc, while elderberries have more calcium, copper, iron, phosphorus, potassium, and selenium—one more win for elderberries.

    In terms of phytochemicals, both berries are (like most berries) an abundant source of polyphenols, but elderberries have more, including more quercetin, too.

    Adding up the sections makes for a convincing win for elderberries, but by all means enjoy either or both; diversity is good!

    Want to learn more?

    You might like:

    Herbs For Evidence-Based Health & Healing ← elderberry significantly hastens recovery from upper respiratory viral infections 😎

    Enjoy!

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  • Beat Food Addictions!

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    When It’s More Than “Just” Cravings

    This is Dr. Nicole Avena. She’s a research neuroscientist who also teaches at Mount Sinai School of Medicine, as well as at Princeton. She’s done a lot of groundbreaking research in the field of nutrition, diet, and addition, with a special focus on women’s health and sugar intake specifically.

    What does she want us to know?

    Firstly, that food addictions are real addictions.

    We know it can sound silly, like the famous line from Mad Max:

    ❝Do not, my friends, become addicted to water. It will take hold of you and you will resent its absence!❞

    ~ “Immortan Joe”

    As an aside, it is actually possible to become addicted to water; if one drinks it excessively (we are talking gallons every day) it does change the structure of the brain (no surprise; the brain is not supposed to have that much water!) causing structural damage that then results in dependency, and headaches upon withdrawal. It’s called psychogenic polydipsia:

    Primary polydipsia: Update

    But back onto today’s more specific topic, and by a different mechanism of addiction…

    Food addictions are dopaminergic addictions (as is cocaine)

    If you are addicted to a certain food (often sugar, but other refined carbs such as potato products, and also especially refined flour products, are also potential addictive substances), then when you think about the food in question, your brain lights up with more dopamine than it should, and you are strongly motivated to seek and consume the substance in question.

    Remember, dopamine functions by expectation, not by result. So until your brain’s dopamine-gremlin is sated, it will keep flooding you with motivational dopamine; that’s why the first bite tastes best, then you wolf down the rest before your brain can change its mind, and afterwards you may be left thinking/feeling “was that worth it?”.

    Much like with other addictions (especially alcohol), shame and regret often feature strongly afterwards, even accompanied by notions of “never again”.

    But, binge-eating is as difficult to escape as binge-drinking.

    You can break free, but you will probably have to take it seriously

    Dr. Avena recommends treating a food addiction like any other addiction, which means:

    1. Know why you want to quit (make a list of the reasons, and this will help you stay on track later!)
    2. Make a conscious decision to genuinely quit
    3. Learn about the nature of the specific addiction (know thy enemy!)
    4. Choose a strategy (e.g. wean off vs cold turkey, and decide what replacements, if any, you will use)
    5. Get support (especially from those around you, and/but the support of others facing, or who have successfully faced, the same challenge is very helpful too)
    6. Keep track of your success (build and maintain a streak!)
    7. Lean into how you will better enjoy life without addiction to the substance (it never really made you happy anyway, so enjoy your newfound freedom and good health!)

    Want more from Dr. Avena?

    You can check out her column at Psychology Today here:

    Psychology Today | Food Junkie ← it has a lot of posts about sugar addiction in particular, and gives a lot of information and practical advice

    You can also read her book, which could be a great help if you are thinking of quitting a sugar addiction:

    Sugarless: A 7-Step Plan to Uncover Hidden Sugars, Curb Your Cravings, and Conquer Your Addiction

    Enjoy!

    Don’t Forget…

    Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!

    Learn to Age Gracefully

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  • Sciatica Exercises & Home Treatment – by Dr. George Best

    10almonds is reader-supported. We may, at no cost to you, receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

    Dr. Best is a doctor of chiropractic, but his work here is compelling. He starts by giving an overview of the relevant anatomy, and then the assorted possible causes of sciatica, before moving on to the treatments.

    As is generally the case for chiropractic, nothing here will be “cured”, but it will give methods for ongoing management to keep you pain-free—which in the case of sciatica, is usually the single biggest thing that most people suffering from it most dearly want.

    We get to read a lot about self-massage and exercises, of the (very well-evidenced; about the most well-evidenced thing there is for back pain) McKenzie technique exercises, as well as assorted acupressure-based techniques that are less well-evidenced but have good anecdotal support.

    He also writes about preventing sciatica—which if you already have it, that doesn’t mean it’s too late; it just means, in that case do these things (along with the aforementioned exercises) to gradually reverse the harm done and get back to where you were pre-sciatica.

    Lastly, he does also speak on when signs might point to your problems being beyond the scope of this book, and seeking professional examination if you haven’t already.

    The style throughout is straight to the point, informative, and instructional. There is zero fluff or padding, and no sensationalization. There are diagrams and illustrative photos where appropriate.

    Bottom line: if you have, or fear the threat of, sciatica, then this is an excellent book to have and use its exercises.

    Click here to check out Sciatica Exercises & Home Treatment, and live pain-free!

    Don’t Forget…

    Did you arrive here from our newsletter? Don’t forget to return to the email to continue learning!

    Learn to Age Gracefully

    Join the 98k+ American women taking control of their health & aging with our 100% free (and fun!) daily emails: