How to Change – by Katy Milkman
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Sometimes it seems that we know everything we should be doing… We have systems and goals and principles, we know about the importance of habits, and we do our best to live them. Yet, somehow, life has other plans for us and things don’t quite come together they way they did in our genius masterplan.
So, what happened? And more importantly, what are we supposed to do about this? Katy Milkman has answers, right from the start.
Sometimes, it can be as simple as when we try to implement a change. It’s not that there’s a “wrong time” for a good change, so much that there are times that are much more likely to succeed than others… and those times can be identified and used.
Sometimes we’re falling prey to vices—which she explains how to overcome—such as:
- Impulsivity
- Procrastination
- Forgetfulness
- Laziness
We also learn some counterintuitive truths about what can boost or sabotage our confidence along the way!
Milkman writes in a compelling, almost narrative style, that makes for very easy reading. The key ideas, built up to by little (ostensibly true) stories and then revealed, become both clear and memorable. Most importantly, applicable.
Bottom line: this is a great troubleshooting guide for when you know how everything should be working, but somehow, it just doesn’t—and you’d like to fix that.
Click here to check out “How To Change” on Amazon, and get those changes rolling!
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Get Better Sleep: Beyond “Sleep Hygiene”
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Better Sleep, Better Life!
This is Arianna Huffington. Yes, that Huffington, of the Huffington Post. But! She’s also the CEO of Thrive Global, a behavior change tech company with the mission of changing the way we work and live—in particular, by challenging the idea that burnout is the required price of success.
The power of better sleep
Sleep is a very important, but most often neglected, part of good health. Here are some of Huffington’s top insights from her tech company Thrive, and as per her “Sleep Revolution” initiative.
Follow your circadian rhythm
Are you a night owl or a morning lark? Whichever it is, roll with it, and plan around that if your lifestyle allows for such. While it is possible to change from one to the other, we do have a predisposition towards one or the other, and will generally function best when not fighting it.
This came about, by the way, because we evolved to have half of us awake in the mornings and half in the evenings, to keep us all safe. Socially we’ve marched onwards from that point in evolutionary history, but our bodies are about a hundred generations behind the times, and that’s just what we have to work with!
Don’t be afraid (or ashamed!) to take naps
Naps, done right, can be very good for the health—especially if we had a bad night’s sleep the previous night.
Thrive found that workers are more productive when they have nap rooms, and (following on a little from the previous point) are allowed to sleep in or work from home.
See also: How To Nap Like A Pro (No More “Sleep Hangovers”!)
Make sure you have personal space available in bed
The correlation between relationship satisfaction and sleeping close to one’s partner has been found to be so high that it’s even proportional: the further away a couple sleeps from each other, the less happy they are. But…
Partners who got good sleep the previous night, will be more likely to want intimacy on any given night—at a rate of an extra 14% per extra hour of sleep the previous night. So, there’s a trade-off, as having more room in bed tends to result in better sleep. Time to get a bigger bed?
What gets measured, gets done
This goes for sleep, too! Not only does dream-journaling in the morning cue your subconscious to prepare to dream well the following night, but also, sleep trackers and sleep monitoring apps go a very long way to improving sleep quality, even if no extra steps are consciously taken to “score better”.
We’ve previously reviewed some of the most popular sleep apps; you can check out for yourself how they measured up:
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Lemon vs Lime – Which is Healthier?
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Our Verdict
When comparing lemons to limes, we picked the lemons.
Why?
This one’s simple today. They’re both comparable fruits in most ways, and their macro profiles are almost identical. When it comes to vitamins, however, they stand apart a little.
Both are most well-known for their vitamin C content, but lemons contain about 2x the vitamin C of limes.
In other vitamins, they’re not too far apart. Technically limes have 2x the vitamin A, but this doesn’t count for much because it’s a case of “two times almost nothing is still almost nothing”.
In the category of minerals, neither fruit is a very good source of most minerals, and the minerals they do have, are mostly more or less the same.
Both are acidic, and this can have blood sugar benefits in both cases (and, if not careful, damage tooth enamel in both cases). Nothing to set either apart from the other here.
So, it comes down to the vitamin C! In which category, lemons take the prize with their higher content.
Want to learn more?
You might like to read:
10 Ways To Balance Blood Sugars ← where it talks about the use of vinegar here, it’s about the acidity, so lemon juice or lime juice is an option too!
Take care!
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Freekeh Tomato Feast
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Fiber-dense freekeh stars in this traditional Palestinian dish, and the whole recipe is very gut-healthy, not to mention delicious and filling, as well as boasting generous amounts of lycopene and other phytonutrients:
You will need
- 1 cup dried freekeh (if avoiding gluten, substitute a gluten-free grain, or pseudograin such as buckwheat; if making such a substitution, then also add 1 tbsp nutritional yeast—for the flavor as well as the nutrients)
- 1 medium onion, thinly sliced
- 1 2oz can anchovies (if vegan/vegetarian, substitute 1 can kimchi)
- 1 14oz can cherry tomatoes
- 1 cup halved cherry tomatoes, fresh
- ½ cup black olives, pitted
- 1 5oz jar roasted peppers, chopped
- ½ bulb garlic, thinly sliced
- 2 tsp black pepper
- 1 tsp chili flakes
- 1 sprig fresh thyme
- Extra virgin olive oil
Method
(we suggest you read everything at least once before doing anything)
1) Place a heavy-based (cast iron, if you have it) sauté pan over a medium heat. Add some olive oil, then the onion, stirring for about 5 minutes.
2) Add the anchovies, herbs and spices (including the garlic), and stir well to combine. The anchovies will probably soon melt into the onion; that’s fine.
3) Add the canned tomatoes (but not the fresh), followed by the freekeh, stirring well again to combine.
4) Add 2 cups boiling water, and simmer with the lid on for about 40 minutes. Stir occasionally and check the water isn’t getting too low; top it up if it’s getting dry and the freekeh isn’t tender yet.
5) Add the fresh chopped cherry tomatoes and the chopped peppers from the jar, as well as the olives. Stir for just another 2 minutes, enough to let the latest ingredients warm through.
6) Serve, adding a garnish if you wish:
Enjoy!
Want to learn more?
For those interested in some of the science of what we have going on today:
- Why You’re Probably Not Getting Enough Fiber (And How To Fix It)
- Eat More (Of This) For Lower Blood Pressure
- Making Friends With Your Gut (You Can Thank Us Later)
- Lycopene’s Benefits For The Gut, Heart, Brain, & More
- Our Top 5 Spices: How Much Is Enough For Benefits?
Take care!
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Related Posts
Complex PTSD – by Pete Walker
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We’ve written before about Complex PTSD, but there’s a lot more to be said than we can fit into an article or two.
Pete Walker, a licensed marriage and family therapist, does an excellent job and pulls no punches, starting from the book’s dedication and carrying the hard-hitting seriousness all the way through to the Appendices.
To this end, it absolutely may not be an easy book to read at times (emotionally speaking), especially if you have C-PTSD. On the other hand, you may also find it a very validating 300-odd pages of “Yes, he is telling my life story in words, now this makes sense!”
That said, it’s mostly not an anecdotes-based book and nor is it just a feelsy ride; it’s also a textbook and a how-to manual. It’s a textbook of how and why things come about the way they do, and a manual of how to effectively manage C-PTSD, and find peace. There’s no silver bullet here, but there is a very comprehensive guide, and chapters full of tools to use (and no, not the same CBT things you’ve probably read a hundred times, this is C-PTSD-specific stuff).
Bottom line: this is the C-PTSD book; if you buy only one book on the topic, make it this one.
Click here to check out Complex PTSD: From Surviving To Thriving, and indeed thrive!
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The Vegan Instant Pot Cookbook – by Nisha Vora
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We all know that we should “eat the rainbow” (and that no, Skittles do not count)… So why do we often find ourselves falling into the same familiar habits and well-worn comfort foods?
Nisha Vora, of “Rainbow Plant Life“, is here to make things a lot easier—brightening up our plates is her mission!
In this Instant Pot-authorized, beautifully illustrated cookbook, Vora offers us 90 recipes to do just that. And because it’s an Instant Pot cookbook, they’re all super easy.
What if you don’t have an Instant Pot? Well, don’t tell Instant Pot we said this, but another pressure cooker brand will work too. And if you don’t have any pressure cooker, the recipes are modifiable for regular pots and pans. The recipes also lend themselves well to slow-cooker cooking, for that matter!
Where Vora really excels though is in making mostly-one-pot dishes beautiful and tasty.
The recipes, by the way, are drawn from cuisines from all around the world, and cover:
- summer and winter dishes
- breakfasts, sides, mains, desserts
- the healthy and the decadent (and sometimes both!)
As for the presentation of each recipe, we get at least one full-page photo of the finished dish and sometimes extras of the steps. We get a little intro, the usual information about ingredients etc, and a no-fuss step-by-step method. It’s very easy to use.
If you have allergies or other dietary considerations, this book is pretty mindful of those, making substitutions minimal and easy.
Bottom line: this comprehensive book will seriously brighten up the colors of your cooking!
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Breathe; Don’t Vent (At Least In The Moment)
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Zen And The Art Of Breaking Things
We’ve talked before about identifying emotions and the importance of being able to express them:
Answering The Most Difficult Question: How Are You?
However, there can be a difference between “expressing how we feel” and “being possessed by how we feel and bulldozing everything in our path”
…which is, of course, primarily a problem in the case of anger—and by extension, emotions that are often contemporaneous with anger, such as jealousy, shame, fear, etc.
How much feeling is too much?
While this is in large part a subjective matter, clinically speaking the key question is generally: is it adversely affecting daily life to the point of being a problem?
For example, if you have to spend half an hour every day actively managing a certain emotion, that’s probably indicative of something unusual, but “unusual” is not inherently bad. If you’re managing it safely and in a way that doesn’t negatively affect the rest of your life, then that is generally considered fine, unless you feel otherwise about it.
A good example of this is complicated grief and/or prolonged grief.
But what about when it comes to anger? How much is ok?
When it comes to those around you, any amount of anger can seem like too much. Anger often makes us short-tempered even with people who are not the object of our anger, and it rarely brings out the best in us.
We can express our feelings in non-aggressive ways, for example:
and
Seriously Useful Communication Skills!
Sometimes, there’s another way though…
Breathe; don’t vent
That’s a great headline, but we can’t take the credit for it, because it came from:
Breathe, don’t vent: turning down the heat is key to managing anger
…in which it was found that, by all available metrics, the popular wisdom of “getting it off your chest” doesn’t necessarily stand up to scrutiny, at least in the short term:
❝The work was inspired in part by the rising popularity of rage rooms that promote smashing things (such as glass, plates and electronics) to work through angry feelings.
I wanted to debunk the whole theory of expressing anger as a way of coping with it,” she said. “We wanted to show that reducing arousal, and actually the physiological aspect of it, is really important.❞
And indeed, he and his team did find that various arousal-increasing activities (such as hitting a punchbag, breaking things, doing vigorous exercise) did not help as much as arousal-decreasing activities, such as mindfulness-based relaxation techniques.
If you’d like to read the full paper, then so would we, but we couldn’t get full access to this one yet. However, the abstract includes representative statistics, so that’s worth a once-over:
Caveat!
Did you notice the small gap between their results and their conclusion?
In a lab or similar short-term observational setting, their recommendation is clearly correct.
However, if the source of your anger is something chronic and persistent, it could well be that calming down without addressing the actual cause is just “kicking the can down the road”, and will still have to actually be dealt with eventually.
So, while “here be science”, it’s not a mandate for necessarily suffering in silence. It’s more about being mindful about how we go about tackling our anger.
As for a primer on mindfulness, feel free to check out:
No-Frills, Evidence-Based Mindfulness
Take care!
Don’t Forget…
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