Why You Need More Age-Gap Friendships

Social connection is important for all of us at any age, but if all our friends are of our own generation, that’s likely to become limiting:

Friends through the ages

“How can people at different life stages possibly relate to each other?”, many ask.

And the answer is: by actually letting down the barriers and genuinely nurturing those relationships with an open mind. Seeing people as people, regardless of their age, because we all are.

Oftentimes, having friends of different generations can be socially stigmatized, often unjustly:

• “Why don’t they have friends their own age?”
  • But do you even know that they don’t, or is that just an assumption?
• “That old person is just trying to hold onto their long-lost youth”
  • But are they really?
• “That young person needs friends their own age, not just mentor figures”
  • But is that all an older friend can be? (Answer: no, it is not, people are people)
• “That young person is so kind, befriending that much older person”
  • But as it happens, it need not be an act of charity; what if they just genuinely enjoy spending time together and connecting like that?

And then when it comes to named generations (Boomer, Gen-X, Millennial, Gen-Z, Gen Alpha), that’s often where it seems each generation is socially incentivized to reject the others, with all kinds of stereotypes being exaggerated and/or just plain misconstrued.

But why? And can’t we do better than that?

Creating positive change requires rejecting these divisive generational narratives, and developing greater empathy, understanding, and connection between people of all ages.

Even in the broadest strokes, there are clear benefits for cross-generational friendships, for example:

• Older friends: older friends can contribute accumulated life experience, stories, insights, and lessons that can help younger people avoid repeating mistakes and connect knowledge from the past with the present and future.
• Younger friends: younger friends can provide fresh perspectives, new ideas, awareness of emerging trends, and challenges to established views and ways of living, helping older people remain connected to change.

Writer’s note: this isn’t mentioned in the video, but it’s also worth remembering that it’s not always a case of “older friends bring this” and “younger friends bring that”. Often it will be! But often someone will just happen to have certain qualities you might not have expected of their generation.

For more on all of this, enjoy:

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Want to learn more?

You might also like:

• Can We Side-Step Age-Related Alienation?
• Why Some Friendships Last And Others Don’t
• Bridging The Generation Gap Over The Holidays
• Human Connection In An All-Too-Busy World

And if books are your thing, then we reviewed these two which are both excellent:

• This Chair Rocks: A Manifesto Against Ageism – by Ashton Applewhite
• Women Rowing North: Navigating Life’s Currents & Flourishing As We Age – by Dr. Mary Pipher

Take care!