Dr. Faye Bate cuts through the trends to give advice that’ll last past January the 2nd:

What actually works

…and is actually easy to implement:

Avoid an All-or-Nothing Mindset

• Strict, perfectionist approaches often lead to failure and guilt.
• Small, balanced efforts can be imperfect without being failures!
• Sustainable habits should integrate seamlessly into daily life..

Focus on Unprocessed vs. Processed Foods

• Don’t worry overly about calorie counts unless you have a very specific medical reason to do so.
• Prioritize minimally processed, nutrient-dense foods over highly processed, empty-calorie-dense options.
• Moderation is key—processed foods don’t need to be eliminated entirely; taking things down by just one tier of processing is already an improvement.

Choose Enjoyable Exercise

• The best exercise is one you enjoy and can maintain long-term. If something’s not enjoyable, you’ll soon give it up.
• Trends in fitness shouldn’t dictate your routine—do what works for you.
• Same goes for “body goals”—fashions come and go, while you’re still going to have more or less the same basic body, so work with it rather than against it.

Prioritize Convenience

• Convenience plays a critical role in maintaining healthy habits, for similar reasons to the enjoyment (very few people enjoy inconvenience)
• Example from Dr. Bate: switching to a closer gym led to consistent workouts despite a busy schedule.
• Apply the same principle to food: plan ahead and stock convenient, healthy options (e.g. frozen vegetables etc).

Keep It Simple

• Do follow basic health advice: drink water, eat fruits and vegetables, move your body, and see a doctor if needed.
• Avoid being swayed by sensationalized health trends and headlines designed to sell products—if you want it for a good while first, then maybe you’ll actually use it more than twice.
• Stick to evidence-based, straightforward habits for long-term health. And check the evidence for yourself! Do not just believe claims!

In short: you will more likely tend to do things that are enjoyable and not too difficult. Start there and work up, keeping things simple along the way. It doesn’t matter if it’s not how everyone else does it; if it works for you, it works for you!

For more on all of these, enjoy:

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Want to learn more?

You might also like to read:

The Science Of New Year’s Pre-Resolutions

Take care!

The psychology of Transactional Analysis holds that our interpersonal dynamics can be modelled in the following fashion:

The roles

• Child: vulnerable, trusting, weak, and support-seeking
• Parent: strong, dominant, responsible—but also often exhausted and critical
• Adult: balanced, thoughtful, creative, and kind

Ideally we’d be able to spend most of our time in “Adult” mode, and occasionally go into “Child” or “Parent” mode when required, e.g. child when circumstances have rendered us vulnerable and we need help; parent when we need to go “above and beyond” in the pursuit of looking after others. That’s all well and good and healthy.

However, in relationships, often it happens that partners polarize themselves and/or each other, with one shouldering all of the responsibility, and the other willfully losing their own agency.

The problem lies in that either role can be seductive—on the one hand, it’s nice to be admired and powerful and it’s a good feeling to look after one’s partner; on the other hand, it’s nice to have someone who will meet your every need. What love and trust!

Only, it becomes toxic when these roles stagnate, and each forgets how to step out of them. Each can become resentful of the other (for not pulling their weight, on one side, and for not being able to effortlessly solve all life problems unilaterally and provide endlessly in both time and substance, on the other), digging in to their own side and exacerbating the less healthy qualities.

As to the way out? It’s about self-exploration and mutual honesty—and mutual support:

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Further reading

While we haven’t (before today) written about TA per se, we have previously written about AT (Attachment Theory), and on this matter, the two can overlap, where certain attachment styles can result in recreating parent/child/adult dynamics:

How To Leverage Attachment Theory In Your Relationship ← this is about understanding and recognizing attachment styles, and then making sure that both you and your partner(s) are armed with the necessary knowledge and understanding to meet each other’s needs.

Take care!